Shame Messages: Negative Core Beliefs

Shame & guilt are universal emotions that we have all experienced. The best way to distinguish between guilt & shame is this — guilt says “Woops, I did something wrong, I did something bad.” Shame says “I am bad, there is something...

The Drama Triangle

Ever reflect back on an argument with a loved one and wonder what the heck you were actually arguing about? Somewhere the conversation must have derailed. In any conversation there are two important elements at play — the actual content of the conversation and...

The Benefit of Guilt and the Harm of Shame

Before you start, yes feeling guilty can be healthy and helpful. I’ll explain how and the difference between guilt and shame. I’ve heard people mix up these feelings many times, often giving guilt a worse context than it needs. The basic emotional and...

Self-Critic

  Our brain generates thousands of thoughts each day, including the internal dialogue that runs in our heads.  It turns out the tone of our internal dialogue has a significant impact on our mood and well-being. For example, how many times after we make a...